The Absolute Thrill of Making Your Brain Light Up
Thoughts on the beauty and excitement of a life full of learning
This week I got that feeling. A jolt of excitement. If I had to put it down to anything, I might say that it felt like I was alive.
And it was all because I was sat watching a lecture.
Yep, I know! A lecture. So boring, right? Remember having to sit through classes at school or university? That really didn’t make me feel alive.
But this time I’d chosen to watch it. It was on a topic I love. It wasn’t like at school when we’re forced to learn fifty different subjects, while being interested in five.
It was a Psychology lecture, on the Sense of Self (yes, of course I frickin’ loved it.)
I was so overwhelmed that I immediately grabbed my phone, and messaged my husband.
“THIS IS SO INTERESTING.
FASCINATING.
I LOVE IT. ALL ABOUT THE SELF. FAVE TOPIC!!!!! (+ 10 emojis)”
He ignored me. It was 3pm and to be fair, quite a lot for someone deep in spreadsheets all day. But I didn’t care.
I’d forgotten how incredible that feeling was, to have something literally wake you up like that.
And I wanted to share that feeling with you, because we often put off chasing our curiosity. It’s easy to do. But honestly? That wild, electric feeling of learning something you care about — we deserve more of it. And I know for sure that I don’t give myself permission to feel it enough.
Why I Struggled To Start
I neglected Curious Imogen for ageees.
I spent my energy on my job, my social life, and my relationship. I was busy, sure, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t find space for something more. For learning.
In my instance, I’d wanted to learn more about psychology for years. I particularly loved reading about personalities, communication differences, relationships, and self-esteem.
Sometimes I’d watch a TED talk or buy yet another psychology book, only to let it collect dust. I’d feel the urge to learn, but rarely follow through.
I think I held back because I couldn’t justify learning just for the joy of it. I didn’t need it for a certain career. It would just be interest. Building up knowledge because I wanted to. That didn’t feel like enough.
I’d research post-graduate courses in psychology, get excited, and then do nothing about it.
Meanwhile, people would suggest training related to my old career—marketing stuff, mostly in areas I didn’t actually care about. “Do it for the credentials,” they’d say. “It’ll impress employers. It’ll earn you more.”
I’m not surprised I always struggled with that, that it wasn’t enough to motivate me.
Building up knowledge is hard enough as it is, but it’s even more challenging when the motives aren’t aligned with who you are and what genuinely lights you up.
It takes effort. It takes brainpower. Nobody wants to read a non-fiction book and not take any of it in, right? I want to remember what I’m learning. I want it to stick.
And for that, I need to be in the right zone. I need focus. I need motivation.
How About Just One Little Thing?
For me, it started with two books: one on DISC profiles (work and communication styles) and another on attachment theory (relationships).
I’m not great at committing to non fiction and I wish I was, because when I do, they’re often mind blowing, and they stay with me.
I still remember the thrill of understanding myself better — and others too, from both those books.
Then one day, I clicked play on a social psychology course on a site called Coursera. It was free.
I didn’t even complete the course (if I don’t put money into it, it makes it a lot harder). But I loved it.
I lit up. I smiled. I told my uninterested husband about it over dinner (he loves coming home from a long day at work to me!)
All of this was enough to light the fire inside me that continued to burn slowly for the next year (or five…), up until I decided to actually commit to learning more and dedicating more time in the subject.
The Overwhelm Of Learning
I often feel overwhelmed. Yes, at life in general, but particularly when there’s just so much I want to know, but my brain can’t handle it all.
I sometimes get envious of other people’s knowledge in a topic I’m interested in. I’m all like “damn! Why don’t I know that?”
But I’m learning (slowly) to turn that into a positive. To see not what I’m lacking, but what I have the potential to learn about. And be excited. Really excited.
To have a curious nature is a powerful thing. I’m proud of it. I’m fascinated by so much. Many things I’m incredibly uninterested in, but when you start me on something I am interested in? Woweee. Another world.
How To Actually Commit
A few things have managed to motivate me enough to follow through, hooray! These were:
1. Telling someone that I wanted to do it
My best friend sent me a link to the post-graduate degree I’m now doing, as of June. It wasn’t new news to me, I’d seen all the courses already. I must’ve told her in passing at some point and forgotten, but her reminding me motivated me to actually look into it.
2. Making it personal
I finally started illustrating because I had something to illustrate for. I needed wedding stationery. I wanted me and my husband, in sweet illustration style. I had a vision and no one would execute that to the exact image of my mind, apart from me.
Have I actually developed my skills since then? No! Absolutely not. Too many other interests!
But I did it, I learnt the basics and hey, now I have some uniqueness to my images on Substack (sometimes!)
3. Constant reminders that I chose this, because I’m interested
I struggled to finish a twenty-nine-minute psychology lecture the other day. I had the whole day free, but my brain had already decided it was boring and that I wouldn’t be able to focus. So I kept getting distracted.
You could probably psychoanalyse that. Maybe it was resistance, perfectionism, or just old school conditioning that learning has to be hard.
What did help (ish) was reminding myself that I chose this. Literally saying it out loud before I pressed play: You picked this. You’re interested in it. You want to learn. Just get on with it.
That small shift reframed my mindset. I think the positivity helped me focus more — or at least stopped me from closing the tab two minutes in.
A Final Note
I cannot stress to you enough — if you are interested in something, learn more about it.
Do it, please. Not for me (although I’d love for you to tell me all about it in the comments), but for you.
Not for your CV. Not to turn it into a side hustle.
Just for the joy of knowing more. Experiencing that thrill. That light.
I am sure that you have a million and one excuses.
But is the true , core fear at the heart of it — not being good enough? Not completing it? Becoming overwhelmed?
Now I’m doing a masters I find there are often five words to describe what really could just be one. I really struggle with overly academic papers. There are so many random theories to learn. It’s hard. It’s a challenge. But it’s worth it.
I appreciate in my case it’s big, but I didn’t start like that and you don’t have to either.
What about a short course?
A fascinating book?
Finding someone in the area of interest to chat to? To follow?
A talk.
A meet-up group.
I still procrastinate. I still get overwhelmed. But I’ve realised that giving myself permission to learn — not for work, not for output, just for me — is one of the most life-giving things that I can do.
And it usually does lead to an output, just not one I’d anticipated.
Don’t wait for a valid reason to do it. Just do it now.
Love from,
Imi
P.S. I’d love to know—what’s the thing you’ve always wanted to learn more about, just for the joy of it?
"I often feel overwhelmed. Yes, at life in general, but particularly when there’s just so much I want to know, but my brain can’t handle it all." I totally feel this! To the point of absolute inertia 🤦🏼♀️ and then ADHD makes me swing wildly from one thing to another, picking up shiny trinkets of knowledge that I used to think amounted to nothing, because it wasn't a 'qualification' - now I guess it's actually just making me!
I recently retired. I had a stressful, but interesting IT job previous to retiring. Since I've retired, I've read multiple philosophy books and watched many videos and podcasts about philosophy. Philosophy always interested me, but outside of acedemia what can you do to earn money with philosophy?
In addition, I was always interested in the assassination of JFK. Since retiring, I've read a whole bookshelf of books on that topic and watched many podcasts and videos of a handful of good JFK assassination researchers. One interesting thing I noticed, is that the best JFK researchers aren't famous and don't have university degrees. The best ones are folks with normal jobs who do tons of research because it is what they want to do; it fascinates them!